Yeah, maybe I'm selfish

We're never on the same page. EVER.
I think about certain things, feel certain things but you think & feel oppositely.
Then on another day, you think about the same shit I had thought, feel the same fucking feelings I had felt, but on that day I feel the exact opposite.

It's always contradictory. Always inconsistent. And we don't even know it.

I'm starting to think..
no, I don't know what to think anymore. I don't want to think anymore.

My mind blurs when I think about the pain. You know, the pain.. I'd rather not go into another detailed & immensely dejecting tirade about "the pain". Because I've done my fair share of that..in, well, almost all of my entries.

Too many things go on in my head & being the fucking person I am I always over-analyze shit, & I have this tendency to overwhelm myself which leads me to feel very, very depressed. Nowadays all I've been doing is think, think, think, think,think, fucking think. I don't even have time for myself anymore. I am so tired, seriously. Physically, emotionally, & mentally.

I haven't felt this in a while; pain on the left side of my chest.
It's funny how dreams can affect you this greatly in real life.

Lost My Pieces